Thursday, October 20, 2016

Blood, Sweat and Bad Water.


There is something wonderful and awful about the last swallow of water in the canteen. Chances are you have been saving it, hoarding it away until you just can't stand it any longer. By the time you finally commit to drink, you're not only good and thirsty but maybe a little fearful for the future.
Never-the less, you savor the water all the way down from the tip of your tongue, to the back of your throat and all the way down the esophagus. Wonderful. And then it's gone and the hand is dealt.

This happened to us the very first day of backpacking in Grand Gulch. A veteran of many canyon hikes, I had gone into the excursion with a cavalier attitude and was carrying only my standard liter and half day hike ration. It had never been a problem. The bottom of a steep deep narrow wilderness canyon is filled with springs and potholes and rocks and rivulets. There's always water to be found. Except today. Besides a few pot holes in the side canyon we entered first thing in the morning, this canyon was sandy, brushy and very, very dry. Earlier we had passed a pair of well-heeled hikers who were struggling mightily (despite their top-of-the-line equipment) under a load of 40 liters of water! We had laughed at them heartily, but now were wondering if they knew something we didn't.

 Nothing we could do about it now. Ari and I were well past the point of no return. At the last side canyon we'd spent an entire hour bushwhacking around looking for a spring that the BLM rangers had assured us was there. Along with another guy we met on the trail, we looked high and low. Found one vaguely swampy area underneath some more ruins, but no standing water of any kind. We were all concerned that the canyon bottom was very dry—drier than we expected—and seemingly getting drier as we headed down canyon. Our new friend made his choice early. If he didn't find water in this side canyon he was aborting his trip—and retracing his steps back to the trailhead.

Neither Ari nor I are known for our patience and after fruitlessly searching for an hour, we returned to the confluence of the side canyon and weighed our options. It was early afternoon, we were very low on water, and it was only getting warmer. Consulting the map, we decided to press on—putting our hopes on a vaguely defined feature on the map called “The Pour-off.” If we couldn't find water anywhere else, I assured Ari, there should be some kind of water at the bottom of a dry falls. Falls, after all, denote rock. Rock holds water.

As we trudged down the canyon, however, the sand only got deeper. Our last swallows of water had come and gone. As the day wore on, the packs got heavier and the legs more sluggish. In many ways the first day of a multi-day backpack is the worst. The pack is at its heaviest, the legs and body are at their softest and the body is just not trail hardened. The day was growing to be a long one and we were putting in miles we hadn't counted on. I was beginning to regret not training harder for this hike—a universal feeling of backpackers everywhere.

We came to a muddy patch of wet ground and I seriously considered digging for water—something I've never had to do anywhere and was frankly skeptical it could be successfully done. Ari offered, however, to take off his pack and scout ahead. He came back a half hour later saying he hadn't found water but there was another muddy spot on the ground ahead and a better campsite so we shrugged into our packs once again and headed down the canyon. It was a beautiful site on high ground just off the main channel and as we were trudging up to it, I glanced down canyon and saw where the riverbed just ended. We dropped our packs and grabbed out water jugs.

“Cross your fingers.”

The Pour Off was there, a hundred yards from camp. And, as I'd assumed, the canyon bottom slowly turned to rock. When we arrived, not only did we discover a large brackish water hole at the base of the falls but, even better, a series of rock pot holes on top—the largest of which still contained water. We were saved. But our work was not over. The water was still so silty that it was impossible to pump more than a liter of water at a time before the filter clogged up. So it was pump a liter, disassemble the water filter, scrape it down, wash it, reassemble and then pump another liter. Repeat. It took us an hour and twenty minutes to filter enough water for the night. And this was the scenario that would play out over several days. This canyon, it turned out, was a very dry place.

It was easy for us then to imagine why this canyon, once home to one of the largest Anasazi populations in the Southwest, was abandoned. Some of the best preserved ruins in the world dot the Grand Gulch—a 58 mile long snaking tributary of the San Juan river. Many look as if the occupants walked away a few months ago. Metates and scraping tools lay next to boulder work areas. Corn cobs still fill many of the granaries. In places the pottery shards are like litter on the ground. Large panels of pictographs cover the canyon walls like graffiti. Some in very rare colors of green and blue and orange. Some of the ruins still have their floors and roofs intact. There is an actual kiva you can still enter.
The mysterious "Green Mask."

A sexy tomb raider. Somebody should make a video game!


Beyond the prehistoric ruins, the canyon itself was lovely. There were many cool rock formations, alcoves splashed with fall colors and a sky that was so blue it hurt the eyes. We did great slick rock climbs to granaries that seemed impossible to reach from the canyon floor. We watched the moon rise over the canyon walls and the star-blown skies after it set. On the second day we found a fantastic camp above a cool clear stream with pictographs visible across the canyon from our sleeping bags.

The place was the Garden of Eden except for:

Water. A couple days after finding a clear stream in a side canyon, we spend another wasted day (and all our remaining good water) fruitlessly searching for another spring. As we ventured deeper into the canyon and off the beaten track, the bushwhacking was brutal. Continuing down the main dry channel meant fighting overhanging branches, climbing over dead fall and trudging through sticky muck. Trying to fight a path over the banks meant face slapping, leg ripping brush and steep ascents and descents in and out of the main channel. We even tried to climb up the canyon sides and stay near the slick rock walls, but the prickly pear were so thick there was no where to step. And the trail always went cold at a steep side gully that was dead drop.

That's backpacking. For every beautiful sunset, there's the moment you wake up and realize a rat is crawling across the top of your tent. For every clear stream, there's a vile, brackish puddle of ooze that might keep you alive for another day. For every unexpected Indian discovery there's a pair of shorts ripped from waist to cuff from a razor thorn. For every pretty picture, a cactus needle imbedded into your calf. And for every shot of tequila carefully hoarded, there the point in the hike when you realize that you absolutely cannot eat another gram of trail mix.

To the hundreds of people who lived here in America's recent stone age, I'm sure it was the Garden of Eden. They had everything they wanted: food, water, beauty, room to roam and time to create beautiful art and pottery. But even a garden has limits, boundaries and needs balance. When something tips the scales—overpopulation, a prolonged drought, warfare—then even paradise will fail. It's a lesson for all of us. Appreciate what we have, do all we can to protect it and strive for balance.

Watch the sunset, ignore the rats.


Bottom's up, y'all!
And drink plenty of water.

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Why I Love Fishing



Dawn. I am alone on the boat ramp as I push my kayak into the water. I glide away with barely a sound and onto the lake that is like a mirror laid down in the middle of the Sonoran desert. Around me huge saguaro loom right above the water's edge and their image lies below me as I stroke quietly away from the last of civilization. Only the sound of the small birds singing in the cactus thorns and the slight splash of my paddles reach my ear this early in the morning. I am completely alone in this desert paradise...

I'd studied the lake from Google Earth the night before so I know the best fishing bet is a series of coves and inlets located on the other side of the lake. I waste no time digging in and paddling hard for the other shore. It's a good workout and a fine way to start the day and get the blood pumping before the action of actually catching fish. I push into the paddling and within 20 minutes I am clear across the lake and sliding into a small cove. I put up the paddle and drift silently as I ready my rod and reel, pour myself a cup of coffee from the thermos, and made my first cast into the glassy waters--

And my first snag of the day. I yank and tug on the snag and finally have to put my rod away and paddle back towards the snag,. The water is crystal clear and I can see a shallow ridge below me and, yes, an old tire that my lure is hung up on. I drift by the snag, get my rod back out of the holster and tug and pull some more.

Snap.

My line breaks. @#$%! That was an $8 dollar lure! Not a good beginning--- no wait. There it is. Free of the line, it has floated back to the surface. This is good. A much better omen. I paddle over to scoop up my lure, still holding my rod—and it separates. The two halves come apart when I bend over to pick up the lure and the top half of the rod slides into the water. And sinks. With no lure on the end of the end, there is nothing to hold it and it slowly drifts to the bottom of the lake. @#$%! That is my favorite, most expensive rod! You've got to be kidding me!

I look down. The water there is crystal clear and I can see my rod lying on the bottom about six feet down. I briefly contemplate diving in but the combination of the cool water temp, my current attire of flannel shirt and denim shorts and the actual effort of exiting and entering a loaded kayak quickly rules out that option. But, maybe if I can reach it with end of my paddle and coax it further up the ridge where it is shallow... I get my paddle in a upright position, spilling my coffee in the process, and find I can barely reach the rod with the end of my paddle. Trying to see through six feet of water and aim the paddle accurately proves difficult, however. I barely manage to touch it once and maybe move the end of the rod an inch before I drift out of range. I try to alternate between paddling and probing while spinning around in circles. My vision is starting to play tricks on me and the whole thing is becoming very trippy. I am getting dizzy and a little seasick.

Finally I spin away and lose sight of the rod completely. I circle around in the kayak looking for it, staring into the water until I'm dizzy again until... There it is. The rod is still lying on the bottom. I start the process all over again only this time manage to kick up enough muck on the bottom to obscure everything. Again, I eventually drift away and lose sight of my rod. Okay, only about 45 minutes of wasted prime fishing time. On to Plan B. Time to break out the spare rod...

Which is in the truck on the other side of the lake.

Oh well, time for another workout. I lean into the paddle and in another 25 minutes am back to the boat ramp. The ramp is now starting to get busy as the bass boats are backing in left and right. So much for my early start and fishing advantage. I leap out of the kayak, run up the boat ramp, jog down the parking lot to my truck and suddenly remember that my keys are in the dry bag still in the kayak. I jog back out of the parking lot, back down the boat ramp and fish the dry bag out of the bow of my kayak and return to the truck. I get my spare rod and return back to the kayak.

Back across the lake. A stiff breeze is now blowing against me so it takes another 35 minutes to take it back to the area I was at before. Bad luck area, I decide so I paddle on to the next cove. After 10 more minutes paddling, I find another beautiful little cove--crystal clear water and a nice shelter from the breeze. Yeah, perfect. I pour another cup of coffee. I fix a new lure to my new rod, reach back to make a cast and...

Apparently while a-fixing the reel to the new rod I'd accidentally flicked the reverse lever. The result was a flying tangle of backlash line that spaghetti-s into my lap and hooks the lure into the tow strap on the front of the kayak. @#$%!!! I reach for my knife, knocking over my coffee again and hack away at the line. Stringing a fishing rod is a pretty straight forward process on dry land. It's even fairly easy standing on a boat. In a kayak, in a sitting position where you cannot reach the end of the rod, and with waves rocking you back and forth, however, it's a bit of a... process. Finally after three or four attempts, I manage to string the rod. I decide to ignore the lure embedded in my bow (I'll extract it later) and put a new one on. Except... I don't have any more swivels. The only one I brought is attached to the lure in the bow handle. Nothing to do but paddle ashore, get out, tug and pull my lure from the strap, get back in and shove off once again.

Okay, time to get serious. Now I am ready to do some real fishing. I paddle out to a promising point, and with a brief prayer to the fish gods, give another cast. And another and another. I fish for another ten minutes with nothing happening and then... FISH ON! I set the hook hard and begin reeling furiously, only to realize after two or three minutes that the fish isn't moving. @#$% ! Another snag. Swearing like a sailor, I reel myself angrily toward the snag not bothering with paddles. I get over the snag and yank angrily at the the obstruction whatever it is. Finally out of sheer brute strangth, it breaks free and I reel in. I decide I need a different, more snag friendly, lure. As I go to swap them out, however, I notice that I have managed to mangle my one good swivel. The little catch that holds the pin in place has come loose and is sliding up and down--effectively making it unfasten-able. @#$% piece of Chinese shit!

I could go without a swivel but that would severely limit my lure choice. Many of the lures I've brought just don't have the same action without a swivel. So I get out a pair of needle nose pliers and attempt an on-board repair. If attempting to string a fishing rod on a rocking kayak is a challenge—try bending a hair-sized strand of wire to a piece of metal the size of a dime. Of course in the process I manage to pinch the lip of skin between my thumb and forefinger which begins to bleed copiously. Now the bottom of the kayak is covered in dirty water, coffee, about 10 yards of twisted mono filament--and blood. No problem. I have duct tape. I am busy bandaging my hand so I don't notice the wind beginning to pick up and starting to generate some larger waves that are pushing me towards shore. Until, of course, the moment when a wave knocks me into a large rock and almost throws me over. Only through quick reflexes and a keen sense of balance do I manage to stay upright. My tackle box, which was open on the dashboard in front of me, however, was not so fortunate. It goes over the side spilling the entire contents into the water. @#$%!!!

I leap out into knee deep water and attempt to pick as many of my lures, hooks, sinkers and jigs as I can out of the water. Meanwhile the waves are still pushing the kayak slamming it repeatedly into my shins while I frantically salvage expensive @#$% fishing gear. Of course while I'm plucking my shit out of the drink, my rod and reel slips in. While I'm retrieving my rod and reel, my paddle falls in and,
somehow defying the laws of physics, it drifts away from shore. I have to stop what I'm doing and half wade, half swim to get my paddle back. Meanwhile the waves have flipped my kayak over and it is filling with water. Disgusted, pissed, still swearing like mad, I drag everything ashore. Turn the kayak over. Empty the water filled tackle box. Line the lures I could recover on a rock to let them dry. Wring out my flannel shirt. Take a deep breath. Try to get myself together.

Okay. I'm better now. While everything’s drying out, I've got some time to kill. Might as well do a little shore fishing. Way less complicated than trying to do it from the cockpit of a kayak anyhow. It'll relax me, get me back in the zone... I set everything up again (forgoing the swivel) and put on my lucky lure. I make a couple casts from shore and---

Sure enough I snag out, break the line and lose my lucky lure.

I drop the rod and reel. Pick up the coffee thermos and shake it to determine it's empty. I look at my watch. 8:35 am. I walk to my cooler and open a beer.

I'm sure the fishing will be better this afternoon anyway.





Sunday, January 10, 2016

Dry January. Why Try Dry?



I just finished another eight hour shift from hell. The manager is on vacation, we're under staffed, payroll has been dramatically cut for the first quarter and people are still pouring in for more and more groceries. I've had it. I'm hungry and surly. I hate this f#$&ing diet and I really, really want a beer.

Welcome to Dry January. The poet who said “April is the cruelest month” never tried to go stone cold sober for the month of January while dieting. It really, really sucks. Or as my wife said five days into it, “This is way too hard. I quit.”

In years past, I've quit too. I figure my batting average for this tradition since I started it about 5 years ago is about .500. Last year,I think I barely made it a week on the alcohol part. This year, however, I'm determined to hang tough, not only to exercise some will power, self-discipline and detox, but to restore some sanity to the incredible consumption machine that has become our lives.

We have too much in this country. We consume too much. We made no sacrifices or compromises in our daily lives. I see it every day in the grocery store: grocery cart after grocery cart filled to the brim with meat, junk food and sweet treats pushed by increasingly obese people-- many whom have become so fat that we now provide them motorized transport around the store to enable them to buy more food and become even fatter. It's insane.

We are a society out of balance.

Throughout history, we've always had feast days. A day every season we put aside to celebrate life, harvest, family, spirit and food. Every society and religion had this. In a simpler more agrarian society where subsistence was the measure of success and three square meals was never a given or even the norm, a day of feasting really meant something. It was special. Even then, however, there was a balance. Along with feast days, every major religion had fasting days. Days of self-deprivation, of contemplation and of penance. There was a balance.

Today, in mainstream American life, we don't have that. Everyday is a feast day topped with super deluxe feast days. It's a new tradition fed by huge corporate interests that have created a new feasting industry. There's big profit in eating, drinking and consumption. Fasting... not so much. Subsequently we've created this machine that just demands increasingly amounts of consumption with no discipline, restraint or balance. And we, obediently, pull up to the table and keep shoveling it in.

Koyaanisqatsi the Hopi call it. Lives out of balance.

I can't fix society. Increasingly I don't seem to have much steering over my own life. But my Dry January is my own small attempt at balancing one small aspect of my Koyaanisqatsi. After the excesses we call the holiday season, a month of hard diet and sobriety is hard, but it's the least I can give. It's small enough penance for the wasteful life I lead.